A DIFFERENT KIND OF JOURNEY 0CT 25, 2015

October 25, 2015

A DIFFERENT KIND OF JOURNEY

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VIEW FROM MY FAVORITE RESTAURANT…GREAT VEGAN OPTIONS AND SMOOTHIES IN ADDITION TO THE VIEW TO KILL FOR 60’S CAFE

I’ve now been in Rishikesh for a full month. And this has been a very different kind of journey for me. Most of this past month I’ve been blessed with lots of work…which is wonderful in lots of ways because besides bringing in some money, it also gives me many opportunities to be of service. But even without “proper” work, I am sent many opportunities to be of service, so neither is the real reason for my having wanted work. I simply enjoy what I do, and couldn’t imagine being without it…especially after the past months at home where I also had more work than I have for several years.
However, without realizing it, I allowed the pleasures of work to actually “rob” me of the pleasures of India. And of course, it wasn’t until I began feeling it physically, that I took notice of what was happening.
I now sit on my rooftop, on my lovely new sofa, relaxing with nothing to do but BE…listening to Chava Alberstein, one of my favorite Israeli singers, manicuring my nails, and jut appreciating all the blessings I have…just being able to BE here being the main one. I must make the most of this time for my Higher Good….
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Deep down I knew a full week ago that I had to cut back, and begin allowing myself to immerse myself completely in the magic that this place is, and the reason I come here. I had already decided that this coming week I begin my “retreat” mode, and if not that, at least vacation mode.
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Just to make sure I took my inner “knowing” seriously, I also received a very powerful card reading with this message repeated several times, and a quick consult with Dr. Arora, had him point a real “nu, nu, nu” finger at me for allowing myself to get so run down after arriving here in such superb health and energy.
So….yesterday I began, and today I continue…very low energy, but will do lots of resting, slow walking, and anything else which strikes my fancy, to pamper myself…including the snack I just had.
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I made it through a month, but finally gave in to the pleasure of hot chocolate and cinnamon roll. Decadent but oh so delicious…and I enjoyed every sip and bite…am still enjoying it.
So, what I think will be happening now, is I will try and continue to upload photos as much as possible, as I have not stopped photographing all the amazing sights, views, colors etc., around me…but don’t think I will be doing much writing…at least not at the moment.

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Enjoy the photos…imagine the stories behind them, and perhaps one day I will fill in the missing details.

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MY TRANSPORTATION TO A RECENT WEDDING

MY TRANSPORTATION TO A RECENT WEDDING

With love light and JOY
Namaste
Jane

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No way, Impossible, Absolutely Cannot Be-Nov 19 2012

November 20, 2012

No way, Impossible, Absolutely Cannot Be-Nov 19 2012

I am packing to go home (and crying) and just before packing them, I decided, just for fun, to open the cards again!!

I am most definitely in SHOCK.

Pulled, for the FOURTH time in a row, the same card: QUIET TIME

Nothing more to say or write.  I have posts and photos which I have not been doing, I have been without internet in my room for about 10 days, and am perfectly content.  But this is part of my forced quiet time.  I will eventually get everything “out there”….

But there is no question that it is not meant to be for at least the near future if I am really meant to enforce this QUIET TIME to rest, meditate and contemplate.

It has been an amazing journey for me….as always, teaching me, guiding me, confronting me with things I perhaps don’t always want to see, but never letting me go home without giving me what it is I need to take back with me.

I am truly blessed and loved.

Namaste from Rishikesh

Jane


India Lesson 2012 FINALLY – Nov. 9, 2012

November 10, 2012

India Lesson 2012  FINALLY – Nov. 9, 2012

I figured it out actually while writing THIS post…so you will have to bear with me until it gets put down in words here…as it happened!

Butterfly on the way to the Clinic

Don’ know if this will ever get posted.  No internet for a few days which is definitely a blessing in disguise for sure.  I am still in my “healing crisis”-taking longer than I had planned on-or what the doctor refers to as: “strong reaction to panchakarma” .

So I am being forced to eat very lightly-my stomach wont’ tolerate much more yet, and resting. Don’t have energy for much else and it is very frustrating.  There is so much I need (or want) to do these last couple of weeks and being forced to stay up in and around my room is annoying and boring…especially without internet!!

Coming Down from my Room

I am now sitting at the lovely new Pundir restaurant where I ordered a fruit salad.  Just anything not to have to go right back to the room.  And to my great surprise, they just put in free WIFI! And luckily I have my new phone which I can actually use with WIFI- not much good for writing, but at least I can check emails and FB.  Which I just did…and what did I find there?

A message from Eckhart Tohl which was exactly what I needed to see as I sit here writing about how frustrating and annoying this forced rest is for me!

“Surrender is the simple but profound wisdom of yielding to, rather than opposing, the flow of life”.

This is THE lesson I was meant to learn here this year.  I must now find the way to put it into practice both here and when I get home.

I’ve been confronting the need to rest versus the need to “make the most” of my last 2 weeks here.  Frustrated that I can’t be out and about and not truly allowing myself to relax into resting. Even though I spend all day up at my room-“resting”.

If the rest is only physical, it is not rest at all.

I have a big lesson to put into practice when I get home and the practice begins now.

No matter how it effects all those loving and dear ones around me…what they expect of me-how they expect me to feel-or what may disappoint them regarding how I come back from India, is truly not my concern.

Only being “true to myself” is what needs to concern me at this time.

This of course includes the lesson of living in complete Faith and Freedom from Fear-knowing that all is as it should be, and is good.

Experiencing ALL in complete acceptance, joy and gratitude and of course, Freedom from Fear.

And now that I have figured it out….I already feel better! More at peace, enjoying this time alone, playing games, doing my needlepoint, reading, listening to music, even dancing some folkdancing in my room – and not thinking about what I “cannot” do, but about all the pleasures of what I CAN do.

And to really make my day…as I started heading back up to my room…I heard my name called from across the street….and when I looked…to my great joy and total surprise, it was Akhilesh!!

And who is Akhilesh you may ask?  Well, that is a story for another post…hopefully tomorrow…or of course whenever these begin to get posted.

Namaste from Rishikesh


The Shift Begins-Three Weeks in Rishikesh – Oct. 31 2012 –

November 1, 2012

 The Shift Begins

Things are starting to shift.  This always happens when I am in India.  The shift is more on an energy level, in perceptions of time, space and self.

Enjoying the blessed energies along the Ganga

These shifts usually take over a month, sometimes longer, before they occur.  But time has a way of utilizing itself to best advantage.  The more time we have, the more time we waste. Time being short this trip, the shift has taken only 3 weeks.

Many things are very subtle. Pretty much unnoticed from the outside at first, but powerfully felt within.  Almost like a volcanic eruption… sudden, surprising  and overwhelming.

One of the physical ways it manifests with me, is that I “find my voice”.

I don’t sing in public out of respect for the sensitivity of others.  🙂  (well, I DO sing but only when lots of others are singing as well as during a “sing-a-long” or group chanting – and I sing softly so no one can actually hear me – except the unlucky person who happens to be sitting next to me)

And very often when I hum along with music in my own house-not even realizing I am doing it, if someone happens to hear me, they always ask me to stop.  I even hum off key!!!

[I always have music playing, in one form or another – depending on my mood and my needs- I must have music in my life- to calm, to excite, to invigorate, to inspire, for romance, for fun, for dancing or just for its beauty.]

So, while here in India, at some point, I “find my voice’, and begin to sing outloud, to chant outloud.  It is a release of secreted inner joy which doesn’t usually express itself, and it is awesome to feel when it occurs… and a huge  and welcome shift for me.

Finding  my “aloneness” again is also a great shift.  Always being surrounded by others-not always physically but mentally and emotionally – can be exhausting and draining , even when they are dear loved ones – of which I am blessed with many- 6 children, their spouses and my 14 grandchildren.  And then of course my dear loving partner and my friends.

The “space” to be completely alone with ME is a rare occurrence – times are few and far between- I make a great effort to at least begin my day with just ME – but very often even this sacred time is snatched from me for various reasons.

This space  for me is a luxurious blessing, and I am at a place where I am now withdrawing from others around me here as well. Going within, alone, as much as possible.

I have slowed down my mornings, leaving later for my treatments, taking this special sacred time to do those things which are most important to my balance and well being – prayer, meditation, yoga, Reiki, sitting in the blessed warmth of the sun, watching the mountain change colors as the morning moves along, sitting quietly along the Ganga eating my breakfast…contemplating or doing nothing…this is a precious time for me.  I always try to bring this home with me, but it is not something which I am able to always do.  And I miss it dearly.

Morning time is sacred space just for me, and I have not been honouring that space.  I tried adapting to the comfort zone of my friend-leaving earlier in the morning for treatments, walking faster than I like to, etc.  And this is another part of the shift.  I will now make my morning fully and solely devoted to my own needs.

My first resolution therefore, has been to at least do what I can from MY end to insure this sacred space.  And that is NOT to touch the computer for any reason, before lunch time-and later if possible.  This began yesterday, here in Rishikesh, and I will do my best to implement it once I get home as well.  It will not be easy, but it is an essential part of keeping the morning space just for ME without the intrusion of others – even others who I invite in via the computer.

My friend also has a certain animosity towards the Ganga – the son of a friend drowned while swimming in the Ganga and she cannot forgive the river for taking him….but this has effected my joy in being near Ma Ganga when we are together.  So I now breakfast alone (she has found a restaurant which  DOESN’T have  a view of the Ganga, not easy to do here in Rishikesh – and I am happy for her),  and the sacred energies once again come through to me as I sit here.

I will now do my Ganga strolls alone as well to completely absorb the healing energies this Holy river so lovingly gives me.

And will enjoy my slower pace of living as well.

Namaste from Rishikesh


Butterflies and Freedom

September 24, 2012

Butterflies have always represented freedom to me. I have a butterfly tattoo (not small to be truthful) on my shoulder which many of the “normal” people in my life are not happy with, but again, it was a statement for me many years ago when I still felt the need to make such statements! 🙂

Last year, just before returning home from India, I came across this lovely creature on the road just outside my guesthouse, and once again, it shouted loud and clear.. FREEDOM. It sat still for a very long time allowing me to admire it and photograph it, as if saying “I am here especially for you and will stay as long as you need me to”.

It was of course a reminder that freedom is something we choose for ourselves – something we can have, and deserve, no matter where we are, and no matter what our situation is in life. It was reminding me that once I get home, I can easily choose to remain “free”, even once I return to the responsibilities and obligations of my reality when not in India. Freedom does not mean disregarding our obligations and responsibilities…it means choosing to be true to ourselves and our own needs and finding the best way to fulfill those obligations and responsibilities to others without negating ourselves in the process.

And of course the message is always timely.

I am now just two weeks before my flight back to India and it has been a long and hectic year plus since I left last time . Many things have found their way into my reality-many good and wonderful things – but also many stressful and energy draining things. I have not been all that good in keeping my balance…in watching out for myself…in being true to myself…and I have paid a high price in dis-ease. I have learned many lessons over this past year, have grown in many wonderful ways, but still needed a reminder of how important this FREEDOM is in my life.

Today, while scrolling through random posts on my India Journal blog, I came across the one describing my meeting with the butterfly above, and of course, the message was rekindled for me.

I know that I am on my way to India, albeit for a short 6 week sojourn, and I know that I must choose to make each minute joyful and stress-less. I am grateful for this blessing and know I will return both cleansed and rejuvenated, on all levels…but that I must also remember to cherish the blessing of FREEDOM to always choose to do what is best for myself, because without it, I will fall back into the same dis-balance and dis-ease which so plagued me over this past year.

I have been given a blessed message, once again…and pray for the wisdom to follow through with the insights it has given me – both in India, and when I return home. Even before this message, I had already made the decision to “vacation” completely while in India…see the post “To Cook or Not to Cook-That is the Question” …a decision based on a deep soul understanding of what is right for me. I must always remember to hear what it is that my soul requires, for that is the only true source of direction and guidance for my Higher Good. The mind tries to control, the ego to exert its power, to tell us what we “want” and the soul speaks softly and gently-telling us what it “needs”. Listening and understanding come in the quiet times – and these were sorely missing in my life this past year.

I find myself in a place of tranquility this past week, which I have not felt in a very long time, feeling “lighter” than I have for ages, and look forward to more of the same – based of course on my own choices – both in India and upon my return home.

The butterfly has reminded me once again that Freedom, and Freedom of Choice, are in my hands, and my hands alone.

with love light and JOY

Jane


Assistance Along the Journey versus Going It Alone-Powerful Message in a Dream

March 8, 2011

Assistance Along the Journey versus Going It Alone-Powerful Message in a Dream

“When from our better selves we have too long been parted…how gracious, how benign is solitude”

The above is a quote by Wordsworth which I read last night in a book I am reading .  I had actually woken in the middle of night, unable to fall back to sleep.  When this happens to me, I don’t fight it, and usually get up to read until I feel sleepy again.  This quote was used in the book, and after reading it, DID go back to sleep, only to find myself in the following dream, which kept recurring until I woke up just now, several hours later.

The dream:

Riding along in a bus and knowing where I have to go.  The bus is going through a familiar area and I know where he must turn to get me to where I have to go (a place called givat Chen which in Hebrew means, loosely translated: “charming hill”).  As he comes to the corner where he must turn right to get me there, I get up to get ready to get off, but then he passes that corner and keeps going straight.  I KNEW I should have rang the buzzer and gotten off right away to continue the short journey to my desired place alone, but my mind told me  “Sit down and wait.  Perhaps he knows an easier way of getting there.  Let him continue to take you”.  As he drove further and further away from my desired location, I began to realize that something was wrong, but hesitated to question him, not wanting to bother him, or the other passengers.  I eventually found myself so far from where I needed to be, that I DID go and speak to him, only to be told that he has no idea where the place is I am talking about, and it was never part of the route.  I became flustered, and angry and frustrated and began shouting and at one point he yelled back at me but the other passengers just asked me to be quiet so that he could concentrate on his job of getting THEM to their desired destinations, and telling me I could not blame him for my not paying attention and knowing when to get off.

– just as I sat down on the bus and realized I would have to find my own way back, no matter how difficult it was, no matter how lost I was or no matter how far away I now was from my desired destination…I woke up!w

There are times when  we all need assistance.  When we are so far away from the place we know we want to be, that we need help getting closer to that path along the journey.

It may be from a teacher, guru, healer, doctor, even friend, relative or relationship.  When you find the assistance you need, it is a wonderful blessing and should be accepted with gratitude and joy. But you must also know when you have been taken as close to your own path as possible by another person…when you see you have come as far as you can with assistance, and then don’t be afraid to ‘get off”…don’t hesitate or you will be taken very far astray.  You can always return to the place you wanted to be originally, but it will then take that much longer and require that much more effort and energy .

Knowing your own strength and trusting your own instincts will always keep you as close as possible to your own truth…assistance is needed at times along the way…no one can do it all by themselves,  but we must also be alert at all times to the signs that we have gone as far as we can with the help of someone else and know when to once again go it alone.

Know which stop on the bus route is as close to your destination as the bus is going to get you and GET OFF.  Walk the rest of the way on your own.  Don’t hesitate-when you know for sure that this is the place, don’t think that perhaps there is a shorter or easier route.  Let your own knowing guide you from there…And if you do NOT listen to your own inner voice, never blame someone else for taking you astray!!


February 23, 2011 – Lesson of Surrender and Release and the Feeling of Wellbeing it Brings

February 23, 2011

February 23, 2011 – Lesson of Surrender and Release and the Feeling of Wellbeing it Brings

I had been hoping that my head cold of the past few days was, just as the doctor had said, a cleansing effect of the panchakarma, and would be over in 48 hours.  But deep down inside I knew this was wishful thinking.  I know myself and my body very well, and know when a full blown cold thing is happening to me.  Aside from the pain from sinus congestion and the constantly running nose, the thing which is most difficult for me is the weakness and loss of appetite (meaning I will loose weight which for me is not good). I feel like I can sleep all day, and at my most energetic, read a little or play a computer game or two.

The idea is to accept this as a positive thing, rather than fight it.  I know this to be true, but always find myself, at least for the first couple of days, being annoyed, angry (with who?-myself, God??), worried about what will happen if this continues for too long, etc.

I KNOW that the cleansing effect of these symptoms is a positive thing, but somehow don’t like the inconvenience of it.

And the same thing happened again here.  At first I ignored the whole thing, until the head pain and weakness got so bad that I could no longer pretend nothing was wrong.

Then of course I do everything I can think of to fight the symptoms and reduce them to a minimum.  Neti pot a couple of times a day, onion and honey, hot ginger, lemon, honey to drink,  extra doses of Tulsi and Vitamin C, tumeric powder, maduvhanni (Ayurvedic herbal cold and cough tonic-fabulous!),  breathing in steam, reflexology to the sinus points and then local sinus massage – in short and of course Reiki – the works.

Until yesterday, I was doing everything I needed to do but was still concerned about how this would effect my panchakarma and that it was inconvenient for the people involved.  Yesterday, even though I was literally awake the whole night blowing my nose,  I  dragged myself down to the clinic, but felt so bad by the time I got there, the doctor agreed no massage, no enema and go straight home to rest “for sure you will be fine by tomorrow”.

On the way back I bought some veggies to make me some soup which was a good idea, and honey to prepare the onion and honey mixture, and literally barely made it back up to my room where I collapsed weakly into bed and there spent the rest of the day, sleeping, or just laying there, feeling sorry for myself. (but of course looking forward to feeling better by the next day)

I took some cold formula before going to sleep just to stop my nose from running and reduce the pain a little (I hate taking these meds, but really needed to sleep), and actually did sleep most of the night, if not quietly, but at least sufficiently.  Woke up this morning with every intention of going to the clinic, but by the time I had “fixed” my hair, and put on my face cream, had a glass of hot ginger, I once again collapsed into bed, totally exhausted!

It was then that I realized that I was fighting, where I should be accepting.  The moment that I decided to surrender the whole business to the powers that be, and release all expectations about what I SHOULD be doing and how I SHOULD be feeling, I immediately felt a sense of relief!  Calm, tranquil acceptance and wellbeing.

I called the doctor on the phone, explained that I was really sick and too weak to come, and he understood immediately. Told me not to worry about the rest of the panchakarma…it would all work out, and that he was sending someone up to my room with some herbal medicine which will give me some relief as well as my kicheri!!

So now I am happily back in bed, with the hot water bottle to keep me warm (yesterday I tried sitting out in the sun and almost not making it back into bed when being overcome with weakness), I have a couple of good books to read, music to listen to, I have plenty of dates and almonds to snack on even though I don’t feel like eating, I have soup already cooked from yesterday, can order something from room service if I DO get hungry, kicheri on the way, and soon the latest episode of House will be downloaded and ready to watch! Plenty of games to play if I get bored, a comfortable bed with enough blankets to keep me warm, pillows to lean on…what more do I need?

I am thankful that I am not very ill, have no fever, no signs of flu (like body pain) and know it is something which will pass in its own time, when it has done whatever cleansing needs to be done, however long that may take.

And the weakness is returning after a few “good” minutes, so I will end this and post it later when some energy returns. Just ordered a porridge for breakfast and life is good!

Namaste

Jane


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